Lead with Style!

By Rick Chromey

Leadership happens when we move people toward desired insights, attitudes, and behaviors. We all lead somebody, but in the church our skill to enact change, instill confidence, and reduce conflict often spells the difference between success or failure, promotion or termination, trust or skepticism.

Naturally, the real question is how will you lead and flex your leadership style?

Tom enjoys the spotlight. His winsome charisma captures his congregation”s heart. He enjoys risks, but Tom”s hasty decisions betray trust and create insecurity. His lack of discipline keeps Tom unfocused and unproductive.

Rob also enjoys risk and change, but with calculation. He”s the man everyone calls to finish the job. Unfortunately, Rob often loses respect with his volunteer leaders and church elders. His brusque and abrupt ways cost him influence and his isolationist habits keep even supporters at a distance.

John is highly respected, cautious, and articulate. His organizational skills and disciplined lifestyle indicate certain success. Nevertheless, John struggles to influence and inspire his team. Many times he would rather fly solo and do the job right than experience failure.

Bob leads from the shadows. His ability to interpret conflict, perceive relational dissonance, and affirm others to succeed is uncanny. His reserved nature creates criticism for Bob, made worse by his difficulty making a decision or a change.

All four of these individuals are competent leaders. Each has unique gifts and strengths for leadership and ministry. And yet, none of these men lasted long. Rob and Tom were both fired. John resigned in frustration, while Bob pastors his third church in five years.

What”s the issue? Some might point to leadership inexperience or the difficult nature of ministry. Others might implicate their educational training or life circumstances.

Yet, the real issues are rooted in their leadership styles.

Some leaders are passive while others are active. One leader quietly supports his team while another charges forward alone. Some leaders are performance-driven while others are more people-sensitive. Some are highly scheduled while others are less organized.

Here”s the real question: Which type of leader are you?

 

Game Show Host (Active/Emotive)

One type of leader resembles a game show host. Loud and lively. Daring and delightful. Energetic and expressive. “Game show hosts” love applause and magical moments. They possess powerful personalities and winsome ways that draw crowds.

Their dynamic style is sparked by impulsiveness, but “game show hosts” quickly learn emotional energy alone cannot move a leadership team for long. Such people are naturally undisciplined, miss deadlines, are tardy, and/or forget promises. Game show hosts love the initial energy of a project, but lose momentum as problems, issues, and conflict emerge. And while they relish risk and embrace change, their decisions based on hunches usually backfire. Success is determined by applause. Consequently, many such leaders experience frustration, short tenures, and burnout.

Tom is a “game show host” who”s learned strategies to better lead his youth ministry. It was a difficult proposition, but he scrapped his undisciplined habits and focused on time and tasks. Tom recognized his ability to motivate, but promised to listen more and talk less. He budgeted calendar time to personally invest in his leaders. Tom also delegated more tedious tasks (program planning, data entry) to a willing volunteer.

Tom now devotes more time to lesson preparation and vision casting. He meets regularly with individuals to flesh out his dreams and ideas. But don”t be fooled, Tom is still Tom. By midafternoon he”s out the door to spend time with the kids.

He still prefers people time to desk time any day.

 

Chef (Active/Cognitive)

“Chefs” are ready-made leaders who want to be in charge. They innately recognize the recipe for success. “Chefs” are decisive, determined, and disciplined. They”re easy to follow and know how to simmer creativity within a plan that nearly always succeeds. As visionary leaders, they”re routinely tapped for outside work and known for their ability to stir multiple pots. In fact, “chef” pastors lead most growing and large churches.

The problem for “chefs” is their objectives often become omnipotent. Performance outweighs people. Their efficiency results in isolation. Like a “lone cook” in the kitchen, they focus more on the task than feelings of who”ll get burned by the process. Chefs easily boil the tempers of the disorganized and spontaneous, but it”s hard to argue with their success. Chefs are intuitive, mission-minded leaders. Success for them is getting things done right and on time.

As a “chef,” Rob realized his salty personality could be flavored with more sensitivity. He scheduled occasional meetings with his volunteers, parents, and elders to hear their concerns. He committed to accountability relationships with respected mentors. Rob also learned to use his self-confidence to motivate his team.

The greatest change, however, was when Rob dropped his isolationist philosophy. “No more lone ranger ministry,” he reasoned. Rob worked hard to initiate and grow relationships. He made his office more inviting and spent time after church to listen and learn. Rob”s organizational skills and scheduling allowed him to work smarter, not harder. Now he”s really cooking!

 

Stage Manager (Passive/Cognitive)

A third leadership style is the “stage manager.” Disciplined to a fault, these leaders work from a script to inspire thoughtful change and possess keen insight as they wisely lead side stage.

“Stage managers” are valuable leaders because they design detailed screenplays. Their aptitude for organization means they relish rules and desire reliability. “No surprises” is their motto; they resist script changes. Let”s do it as we”ve practiced. Decisions are calculated. Success is perfection.

Unfortunately, a stage manager”s deliberate cautiousness causes problems. Stage managers are content to work from tradition and timeliness, which rankles the impulsive types. Some avoid risk altogether, and their analytical leadership threatens, tyrannizes, and tires those who prefer wonder to wit and inspiration to insight.

John is a typical “stage manager.” Micromanagement is his greatest weakness, and he often places heavy rules, criticism, and expectations upon both himself and his staff. John”s perfectionism easily leads him to discouragement when he”s stressed. He”s admittedly not a “people person,” and he struggles to develop relationships.

But John has learned to release his team to be what he can”t. He”s even abandoned the script and developed a sense of humor about his imperfections””which had stolen his joy in ministry. John also committed himself to two relationships in his ministry: to mentor and be mentored.

It”s no wonder John”s getting standing ovations nowadays.

 

Counselor (Passive/Emotive)

The final leadership style is the quiet influencer or “counselor.” Diplomatic and dependable, “counselors” lead through intimate relationships. Their passivity limits exposure, which means many of these leaders are overlooked. Naturally people-oriented, these leaders exude a coolness no matter how difficult the situation and lead with support and sensitivity. Consequently, they build loyal, close leadership teams.

Unfortunately, “counselors” may crack under conflict. They prefer peace and resolution to dissolution and debate. Emotional pain stings when a counselor seeks to help and heal. Consequently, they”re famously slow decision makers and they avoid risk. “Counselors” desire to please everyone (and hear every opinion), exhibiting an idealism that stalls progress and upsets “game show hosts” and “chefs.” Decisions emerge from consensus and success is cooperation.

Bob is a “counselor” leader who learned to emphasize his relational skills and ability to mediate conflict. A main reason he moved so often was his inability to handle the political games in the congregations he served. Why can”t we all get along? he wondered. Nevertheless, Bob also learned his leadership style empowered hope, especially in smaller congregations needing relational leadership. He allowed his weakness to become his strength.

Bob also combated his indecisiveness by recruiting “chefs” and “stage managers” to his leadership teams. These trusted advisers enabled Bob to make tough and timely choices. He also learned conflict was inevitable but used his calm demeanor, sensitivity, and diplomacy to ensure success.

 

Everyone Leads with Style

Nevertheless, styles will naturally conflict. “Game show hosts” and “stage managers” tend to collide as one argues from emotion and the other from intellect, one wired to the actors and the other to the script. “Chefs” and “counselors” tend to battle, with “chefs” usually winning the war (as “counselors” prefer to flee than fight).

Consequently, it”s important to recognize and harmonize different styles.

“Game show hosts” and “counselors” need the organizational and analytical skills and decisiveness of “chefs” and “stage managers” (who require, in return, their connection to people and sensitivity to issues). “Stage managers” and “counselors” need to inspire their teams while “chefs” and “game show hosts” need assistance to avoid hasty decisions. Sometimes it”s good to wait.

A great team, staff, or board will feature all four styles working in harmony, allowing each individual to freely explore and express his natural leadership orientation. No one should be left out, behind, or alone.

Now that”s leading with style!

 

Rick Chromey is a motivational speaker and leadership trainer living in Eagle, Idaho (www.leadingfromtheedge.net).